Change is in the Air

   It's been a busy month, birthdays, anniversaries, and just your normal life changing events. For me, this month has been and emotional roller coaster. I'm an emotional person anyway, but I've been wanting to change, and grow stronger. I'm working now, with a close family friend, to heal myself and connect with my more spiritual side. I've always been spiritual, but the past few years it's been missing from my life, and I've felt like a piece of my soul was missing, or mourning. So, I'm connecting again with my spiritual side. I'm meditating, communicating with my spirit guides and higher conscience to help me and practicing the four agreements.

 My friend gave me a book that changed my perspective on life. The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz. In short (or as short as I can explain it) it talks about how we are living in a dream, we're not seeing the true world because we are blinded by the 'agreements' we've made. Those agreement are basically believing in what other have said to/called you i.e. "you're stupid, you have a horrible voice, you're only pretty you have no brains etc. Some of the agreements can be more on the positive side, but we're not exploring who we are, we're letting others dictate who we are, and when we accept these agreements as truth, they become stronger. Ruiz says there are only four real agreements to rise out of this hellish dream and become part of the heavenly dream.

1.) Be Impeccable with your word.
Impeccable means without sin, and sin is go against, or harm yourself. What this agreement means is to speak with integrity, to speak the truth, but also in a positive way. Every time we say something negative toward our selves or gossip about others, we are preforming a curse onto our words and making it real. Direct your words toward truth and love.

2.) Don't take anything personally.
What people do, is not because of you. They are reacting from their own feelings that they've manifested. If someone says "You're ugly." They are lost in their dream/reality, and often they are saying what other have said to them or how they feel. Whatever anyone says to you, let it roll off, you know who you are. You know now, they are reacting to themselves, not you, you're just there outlet. 

3.) Don't make assumptions.
To make an assumption is to make a false truth, which leads to misunderstandings, drama and confusion. Be courageous and ask questions, so you know what the truth is. Life becomes more simple when you live in truth. 

4.) Do your best.
 Your best will change from day to day, but as long as you're doing your best, you have a better chance of quelling the negative voices in your head, because you know you did your best.

  His book is very inspirational, and a quick read. Basically, if you live truthfully and surround yourself with positivity, your life will become better than wallowing in the negativity that surrounds so many people. I recommend getting the book, he talks a lot about the tools you can use to help yourself break free from the bad agreements and find peace. Here is a website to help you understand more about the four agreements.

 I'm trying my best to change my attitude and behavior, and so far that's working really well. I'm also working on a plan to help eliminate other bad habits I have, but more on that later. I hope I've inspired some of you or at least made you curious to try the four agreements or make changes in you life.

To My Husband

Me playing in the dam waters

 Today is my one year wedding anniversary. We didn't do anything fancy, just wondered around, acting all mushy and, just being together. In other words, our perfect day. We went to Moore Dam on the Vermont side. It became beautiful and HOT after it stopped raining. The clouds looked so white, fluffy and sparse, which is a relief after so many weeks of rain and thunder showers. It was nice to get out of the house.

Beautiful fluffy clouds after the rain

Picture of party beads at the dam

 I wrote this poem a while ago. It's a personal poem that I've read to him, and dedicated to him, many times. Today, I decided to share this poem with everyone.



Disclaimer: This poem has implied content. It may make you weepy and give you symptoms of feeling like you're in love. Not for children or the weak of heart.
 

My Husband Matthew

To My Husband
 
No matter how many soliloquies, metaphors or rhymes
I put to pen and paper, I can never describe, how I know you’re mine.
It’s in the tingle of your touch, as you stroke my hip,
The feeling I get, when you bite my lips, ears and neck.
It’s in the way our bodies resonate, cuddled into one-
Yes, resonate. They sing in harmony, the same tune.

Your eyes are cosmos, swirling, infinite,
The warmness of them, I could live in it.
I feel it when our hands entwine,
Yours and mine, our souls begin to shine.

It’s the sound of your laugh,
 and all your weird quirks that compliment mine.
I can’t describe it, it’s more than a feeling, or discernible trait.

All I know, between you and I,
You are mine, I am yours,
We are one, together in this time.

Even as you slumber, you hold me, grasping my hand.
The connection we have, full of love and more, soothes my soul.
The joy in your body and mine, as our bare skin touches.
The loyalty you possess is beyond measure.
You hold me high, on your shoulders alone I can see.
You protect me from all my demons, within and out.
Lighting the joy in my heart, I’m ground by your loving force,
I lift you high, guiding you with loving touch.
You’re my everything, staying when I’m mean,
When I yell and scream, saying those nasty things.
Holding me you say “it’s okay, I’ll try to be better for you.”

The rain up here has been constant, but it makes for pretty pictures

Making me cry, for that’s my wish, to be better for you.

It all this love and acceptance, experience and time,
I still can not find a soliloquies, metaphors or rhymes,
To describe how I know you’re mine.
It is what is, we’re bound in life
By an indescribable force, love.

American Independance Day

  Today is America's 237th birthday. I wrote this poem with the idea of it being short and sweet. There are so many poems about America that are 1) long, almost an epic poem and 2)  They always seem to be 'too in your face' about how we're brave, free and the best place to be, which makes us sound arrogant. 

 It reality we're like anyone else in any other country, we love the land we were born in. Home is home no matter where it is. Most countries were colonized and some fought wars to be their own place. I believe that most people have pride in their home land, even if the governing rule isn't something they totally agree with. We don't always agree with the policies and politics, nor how we as Americans are portrayed. We are a melding pot of cultures, ideas, and personalities just like any other country. We are not all what you see on the television, and neither is any other countries people that are on television. 

  So, here is my quick, only revised once, poem. I'm celebrating our day of independence, in the rain,with my husband and everyone else who is so inclined.

On the fourth day, in the seventh month, this once sovereign ruled country,

Declared freedom, from island rule, two hundred thirty seven years ago.

Our home was born from blood and war.

For years our ancestors, with muskets and lead, waged with bitter hate

A war for our freedom evermore.

They prevailed in battle, the underdogs, won the country they loved so much.

They, our fore-fathers, created a fair rule, a renewed country with a new kind of people.

It’s worked thus far, so every year on the day we declared our country ours,

We celebrate with fireworks, parades and patriotic pride, with flags displayed up high.

This is where we’ve all lived, a country, this is our home.

It’s not perfect, no place is, but, to me, there is no place I’d rather be,

Than in the land that is free. I will always love the land I call home,

So I’ve written this poem, to express my love, on the day of my countries birth.

Night Time Goddesses

   This poem, I wrote in the winter time, after randomly looking up deities I came across three that caught my eye. Asteria, is a Grecian Goddess that has to do with falling stars; Nephthys, an Egyptian Goddess, she was associated with birth and death and the night; Breksta, a Norse Goddess, who guards us when we're sleeping against evil beings and nightmares. I don't know why I was drawn to theses three, but this was the result (after rewriting it three times). Do you pray to anyone at night?


 Night Goddesses

Black inked sky, glowing moon up high,
deep indigo clouds drift on this peaceful picture.
Raven hair streaming, white dress flowing,
Asteria, is running swiftly on the celestial sphere.
Stars that speckle the sky, twinkle as she passes by.
As she runs, she brushes some of the gleaming stars,
they fall, in flaming glory, a radiant show.
She chases them, laughing, her laugh is chimes on the wind.
Asteria, is one Goddess of the night, born from stars and sky.

In a desert land, the wind blows softly,
carrying the sounds of a newborns cry, and an elders last breath.
Nephthys, matron of the slumbering sky, is Mother of birth and death.
She is the Goddess prayed to for safe birth at night,
and the deity to shepard souls to the underworld.
She's the duel sided Mother, bringing and taking, life in evening light.

On this night, we're dreaming still, now, in the northern cold.
Breksta's twilight eyes sparkle in our slumbering land,
she watches closely, as we rest our tired, wary heads,
and guards us, by our iron beds.
She's the guardian against evil, and bad dreams.
Pray for her favor, and she'll defend you,
from twilight to morning light.

These three deities, are a few Goddesses of the evening time.
They rule from the twinkling sky, each with different craft, living in foreign lands.
Pray and offer homage, they will answer thee.
These three divine beings, rule the night,
from falling stars, and evening dreams,
from first breath, to last word,
pray and offer gracious thanks, that these Goddesses deserve.